laestry

The Laestrygiants

So, what’s the deal? You won’t eat meat ever again?

Let me put it this way…

Imagine that a race of aliens suddenly arrives on Earth. Let’s call them… “Laestrygiants”.

These beings are twice the size of the average human, and they are very-very hungry!

Unfortunately for them, they crash-land in the middle of Antarctica. No food in sight; just endless icebergs…

After their supplies run out, the first thing they decide to eat is… each other!

Ha, ha! This turned dark really fast!

At some point, however, they encounter their first humans..! Some delicious scientists, full of useful nutrients and tasty brain matter! Yum!

Eew, dude!

Gradually, they also add other beings to their diet, like penguins, seals, fish and birds. It’s open season!

However, they soon realize that they are running out of humans… This alien race obviously comes from a high-tech background, since they managed to travel all the way here, so eventually they take control of a vessel, sail away from Antarctica, and successfully reach South America.

Oh, what a feast they find there!

I get it bro, ok!

They add more and more animals to their daily menu: flamingos, bears, horses, donkeys, llamas – even bugs!

Of course, they are also introduced to the countless cows/pigs/chickens, which they find pleasurable – especially in large quantities! They even learn to cook them on large fires; who doesn’t love the smell of burning flesh?

Wait, wait – how come they’re not dead yet? Is Area 51 asleep?

Oh, yeah, I forgot to mention that they are bulletproof; completely invincible to any weapons that humans have invented! All our efforts to stop them are in vain; we just end up becoming their lunch..!

So, there you have it: a race of high-tech bulletproof aliens, slowly taking over the world, whose endless appetite stops at nothing – they even eat cats and dogs; if it moves – it’s food!

You are disgusting…

Eventually they find out that plants also taste nice, so, in addition to the fauna, they start exploring the local flora.

They try fruits and vegetables, even adding different spices, and they fall in love with the taste! Then they go for our crops: corn, rice, wheat, legumes, seeds and nuts – so many options! They like the variety, so they gradually decide to eat increasingly more of these.

However, they have to eat very large quantities of plants to satisfy their hunger, so they let some humans live, to work the fields and produce more food. When these humans grow older and cannot work any longer, they become food as well; but, hey, at least they lived a happy life serving the aliens until old age!

This is getting tiring…

After a period of coexisting, some of the aliens realize that they can communicate with humans and the other animals! Until then, they thought that these were just irrational beings, only useful for consumption and exploitation. However, they gradually learn to converse via simple nods, signs and sounds!

Eventually, they build special devices that can automatically translate between the different languages, making this process even more straightforward; what a breakthrough!

At that point, the aliens decide that these beings are too precious to consume, so they stop eating animals – humans included. Some suggest to keep eating the fish, since there are so many of them in the sea, but they soon find out that some ocean creatures are actually also aliens, who came to Earth just a few million years before them, so they call an intergalactic truce, and thus stop eating meat altogether.

This is now beyond ridiculous!

The aliens gradually grow very fond of the Earth beings, and they decide to stop exploiting them completely – no more eating of what other beings produce. They manage to use existing parts of human technology to build advanced robots that do all the work – sowing and reaping food from the ground, in order to feed themselves as well as their fellow co-inhabitants of this planet.

Over the course of time, humans and the other animals freely form their own societies away from the aliens, even though some groups choose to stay with them because they like their company.

OK, I get the allegory – you can stop…

At some point, the aliens realize that if they don’t cook their food, it keeps more nutrients intact and is thus more beneficial, so they cease this acquired habit.

Now that the food is not cooked, they have to chew it for longer to make it easier to digest, which makes them feel full faster than before. This enables them to eat less, and yet still acquire all the nutrients that they need.

However, they notice that some of the vegetables tend to get contaminated by bacteria and other microorganisms, making them feel sick sometimes, so they gradually decide to limit their food to anything that falls from trees and shrubs, like fruit, seeds and nuts – along with some spices and dried herbs, which are safer when raw.

After a while —

What, there’s more??

After a while, the aliens decide that eating all day long takes a lot of time! They put their minds together and they come up with a machine that processes their food and produces edible pulp-based marbles, compressing and maintaining all the nutrients in a condensed delivery medium.

They commit to this “supplantarian” lifestyle and gradually completely replace their food with these marbles. They even tweak the machines further to first check their vitals and blood, in order for their marbles to contain precisely the nutrients that each individual Laestrygiant requires!

Are you seriously suggesting to stop eating food?

All the time that they save from constantly collecting, cooking and eating food, they spend on exploring the world outside and inside them – what we call travelling and meditating.

This opens up their mind even further, enabling them to be in peace with nature and with each other. They gain absolute control of their thoughts and actions, diminishing their ego and fully connecting with their true self, thus managing to achieve accomplishments that require very high frequency mental energy.

In the end, they become so powerful that their bodies stop needing any food at all – even the marbles, and they survive solely by breathing the universal life force – what we call “prana”.

And then..?

Only one way to find out!

K.